[jaamkie]

So I'm moving, and decided to go check out my new neighborhood bar last night. Going in there, a woman alone, I didn't at first think was odd, but it seemed that it was. There were groups of men, and couples, and female bartenders, but I didn't see any just-women to talk to. One of the group of men I ended up talking with mentioned something about me being a woman coming there alone, in a friendly reassuring way, but apparently he thought it worth commenting on.

Then another of the guys came on rather persistently, despite me dressed casually, just chilling and not looking for attention, and telling him I had a boyfriend. Of course he was drunk, waiting for his cab, and the female bartender told him to back off, but I feel awkward rejecting guys who want to "get my number" when I'm looking for friendly conversation, and again I wonder what assumptions I walked into about women-alone-in-bars.

So what do people think is the point of going to a casual neighborhood bar? I thought the point was to socialize with random people you might not otherwise talk to, exchange stories and ideas- be entertained and maybe learn something, maybe find a new friend. I'd spend the evening talking and laughing, and exchange phone numbers with anyone, except the stupid implication that it should lead to something sexual, which is not at all what I'm looking for. I really hate guys persistently telling me they're attracted, want my number, etc, because I have a boyfriend and I'm not looking for anyone else, and I feel like even putting myself in the situation to be hit-on is not helpful to our relationship. Yet I DO want to meet and talk to new people, try to be less shy and experience life, interact just human to human, and I thought bars were one place people go open to and expecting that random interaction.