To the people on here saying marriage is an obsolete foolish concept:
Watching my parents' marriage over time, I think they've both learned and grown immensely from the commitment to take responsibility and keep grappling with their issues, instead of blaming the other person and running away from discomfort. I think they've also each learned to appreciate a side of life that they would've formerly dismissed, to respect and admire their different strengths, to embrace and learn to love another set of parents and siblings, families each with their own unique texture and dysfunctions.
I think a marriage is about enlarging your family, regardless of if you further expand it by having children. I think it can serve as an avenue for self-discovery similar to relating to other family members, if you take it to be a lifelong commitment- family is always there, to support you as well as to frustrate and mystify. Unlike friendships that come and go, romantic relationships that come and go, you can't walk away from family when they are difficult and imperfect and exhausting, when they challenge your beliefs and values, when they disappoint your expectations or don't conform to your plan for their improvement, when they lose their job or end up dying in a hospital. I think a marriage in the traditional life-long sense is another opportunity for that (scary, life altering) level of commitment to relating to another human.
Of course, perhaps I have an old-fashioned view of family as well as of marriage. I've met many people who are glad to live far from their parents and siblings, who don't keep in touch or feel responsible for a relationship with them, who have closed themselves off from the people fate has given them to relate to. Today, mainstream American culture at least, is very individualistic and expects each of us to pursue our own happiness based on our impulses each moment- relating to others only when we're in the mood and think we'll gain something from it. Yet I think, and science has shown time and again, that we're not always capable of rational self-interest, often taking short-term ease over long-term gain. I think the cultural values of family and community help to counter our tendencies to walk away too soon, when we still have something to learn and gain from relationships with others.
I want to get married because I want that experience of commitment and growth, I want to make a decision with someone- to keep on relating to each other, living together, learning from each other, deepening our relationship, even when it would seem easier to quit and go searching for someone "better", or to close off when it's scary to be so open.
I sympathize with the OP wanting to get married, if this is what she's looking for, because I agree with everyone else here- you can't force someone into marriage if they don't want it. In my case, my boyfriend shares this view of marriage, and expects to marry before living together. He also grew up in a non-Western country where these values are the norm, and can appreciate both sides- how family/marriage can also stifle and cause dishonesty, like religion, if it is done superficially rather than focusing on genuine relationship and concern for one another.
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