Quote:
Originally Posted by TektonikShift  Come on folks... don't you always use a bit of butter to make things go smoother?
I'm not asking for a "trick"... but an opener, an ice-breaker. |
My butter is always organic... err, I mean authentic
My ice-breaker or opener is honesty and authenticity.
However, to be fair I've been working on being more open and authentic for years, so people come to expect that from me... it's easier to open with honesty when it's expected.
Many many years ago, I had a few situations where I got back in contact with an ex (both girlfriends and platonic friends) after *I* broke their heart... sometimes in unusually unfair and cruel ways.
And every time I approached them to repair the breach, it was spur-of-the-moment authenticity... I felt compelled to share with them my truth. And every time, it provided very good results.
I can't speak for you and your situation specifically, other than you've come asking for advice and the best I can do is offer my own experience.
It is far less important what you say, and more important how you say it and the place you're coming from when you say it. Sort of like the difference between an insincere apology, vs. somebody who doesn't apologize for an incident but instead takes action to make amends... which one do people tend to respond to more effectively?
Ask yourself this:
"If I knew she would respond favorably no matter what I said,what would I say?"
If the answer is strategically focused with sugar, strawberries, and whipped cream on top... then go with that. If the answer is a more direct and simple approach, then go with that.