I wrote a reply in another thread about polyamory and detailing my experience with it.
Quote:
I tried polyamory with my partner when I studied abroad. Seeing as how I was going to be across the Atlantic for 6 months, and we were both very progressive and open-minded, we both agreed that it was the best decision. In fact, he told me to have as much fun and experience as much as I could. I, in turn, wanted him to have the same, to not miss me or be lonely.
Anyways, it was life-changing, I was so open to the world and it received me with open arms. I am so glad I was able to do that because I now realize that there is not only one right person for anyone, and that the world is so big and there are so many connections to be made. It was really amazing. I even fell in love. However, when I went back home, feelings like jealousy and distrust began to arise. The 6 month hole in our relationship left many questions and we were struggling to catch up with one another about everything. We had many fights and tears, but our relationship in many ways also became deeper and more passionate than ever, but it was quite unhealthy and quite emotionally damaging. In the end, we broke up.
I still completely believe in polyamorous relationships but it is extremely tricky because emotions are very volatile and unpredictable. I believe it is only possible with 2 highly conscious, ego-less, honest, and loving individuals. As we all know, there are not too many people who are at such levels of being. I'm sure if there are anyone who wants to try it and believe they can do it in the most positive ways it would be Erin and Steve. I really hope them all the best! I do think life is all about connection and human relationships. Love is infinite and spreading love is always a positive thing.
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I wanted to go into more detail about why polyamory did not work for our relationship. It was about sex. I think my ex-bf became consumed with the idea that I might have had better sex with someone else other than him. This was unbearable to him because our sex was always extremely intimate and mind blowing. However many times I would explain that it wasn't "better" only different, he would not believe me. He had read my travel diary and read about what I wrote about my sexual experience with this other man and felt a lot of insecurity because he claims I never wrote about our sex like that. Anyways, I know when it boils down to it, it was just his ego being bruised but I wonder if this is something that is extremely sensitive for all guys? If so, why are there some men who are so calm and even willing to "wife-swap" or adapt a swinger or polyamorous lifestyle? Basically I want to know more about the male psyche and their view on sex. Is it a tool for possession? A way of stroking the ego? Is this a sign of immaturity?