David,
I agree with the other David here. You should seek professional help...even a suicide hot line
SuicideHotlines.com - When You Feel You Can't Go On -- Let Someone Know Your Pain.
1-800-784-2433
I was depressed when I was in my 20's and even did a couple of attempts...depression is like that...you can't see a way to happiness and you are hopeless.
You need professional help now.