You briefly say you have "done" therapy but don't expand on what professional help you have sought and received. People can develop varying degrees of depression without there being an identifiable reason. It can also be hereditary (you mention elsewhere your mother suffers depression).
If your depression is leading you to suicidal thought you should see your GP as a matter of urgency. They will probably suggest medication and want to refer you to the local mental health services. Please don't dismiss these without serious consideration.
Suggestions of medication tend to go against the grain on forums like this, but in my experience are essential in the treatment of serious mental illness. I have worked in mental health services for about twenty two years now and as well as medication there are other forms of therapy and support available. Don't try to do everything yourself.
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