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Originally Posted by loveliketheflowers  I want to leave him, but I don't want to leave him all alone. We are kind of loners, and he would be all alone. |
You have the instinct many of us women have : the urge to nurture and care for others. And sometimes we look for people with issues to date because then we can "save" them. We can "help" them. "And if they'd just make a few changes, they'd be so much happier". But it never works -- the reality is you cannot make him change. And staying with someone just because he needs saving is not good for anyone.
He is an adult and is making choices. If he is choosing to keep making bad choices, that's his problem not yours. And by swooping in to save him like a mama-bird, you're enabling his bad choices. Your own family is worried about you, and if they're seeing you change in a bad way, maybe for your own sake you need to get away from this.
Honestly, it's time to move on. You can leave him with the gift of help: he is depressed; find him the names/numbers of free mental health professionals (try your Dept of Health for leads). You can also get him the number of homeless shelters, work placement outreach, and anyone else. IMHO he needs to made amends with his parents and see if they'll shelter him temporarily.