Personal Development for Smart People Forums - View Single Post - Those For and Against The Seduction Community

Holistic Star · 01-03-2009, 07:58 PM

Thank you so much for your post. It was really helpful and great to get your perspective. I think my problem with it is that from my perspective it seems consciousness lowering and dehumanising, but perhaps that's because I've seen the third type of guys you mention who get stuck rather than the type who learn, grow and get out.

In addition it's quite interesting what happens to men when they 'run out of material'. If they had been going for the consciousness raising approach this wouldn't be a problem. It's when you learn lines as though they are holy scripture and pretend to be someone you are not that you have problems.

I laughed at the bit in the book the Game where he says 'excuse me' to a woman. And she replies 'Let me guess, you have a friend whose girlfriend is jealous because he still talks to his ex from college.' and he realises what they have done is create clones of themselves rather than free thinkers.

I dont read cosmo or any women's magazines (ok I do have a sneaky peak while I'm at the hairdressers!) and you are right they have been running articles with the titles the ones you mentioned for decades. However the content is generally different. They don't say, try this 5 step opener, try to change locations longer so he gets 'time distortion'. They don't tend to dehumanise men by calling them 'sets' and refering to other people as 'wing-men' or 'obstacles', refer to them having the 'doggy-dinner-bowl-look' when interestsed, write 'field reports' up on the net, call talking to men 'fluffing', 'freeze out' men to make them more interested, think 'one-itis' is a disease or use 'yes-ladders'. Language moulds thought. If you use dehumanising terms for genuine human interaction, it becomes dehumanised.

I'm all for flirting. I'm all for learning how to present your best self, I'm all for makeovers where you look and feel better. One of my favourite programmes on UK TV was 'Would like to meet' where a confidence coach, style coach and relationship coach worked with someone for 6 weeks to help them date. It was wonderful watching people blossom and develop the confidence to interact genuinely with people.

01-03-2009, 07:58 PM	#4 (permalink)
Holistic Star Family Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 1,611	Thank you so much for your post. It was really helpful and great to get your perspective. I think my problem with it is that from my perspective it seems consciousness lowering and dehumanising, but perhaps that's because I've seen the third type of guys you mention who get stuck rather than the type who learn, grow and get out. In addition it's quite interesting what happens to men when they 'run out of material'. If they had been going for the consciousness raising approach this wouldn't be a problem. It's when you learn lines as though they are holy scripture and pretend to be someone you are not that you have problems. I laughed at the bit in the book the Game where he says 'excuse me' to a woman. And she replies 'Let me guess, you have a friend whose girlfriend is jealous because he still talks to his ex from college.' and he realises what they have done is create clones of themselves rather than free thinkers. I dont read cosmo or any women's magazines (ok I do have a sneaky peak while I'm at the hairdressers!) and you are right they have been running articles with the titles the ones you mentioned for decades. However the content is generally different. They don't say, try this 5 step opener, try to change locations longer so he gets 'time distortion'. They don't tend to dehumanise men by calling them 'sets' and refering to other people as 'wing-men' or 'obstacles', refer to them having the 'doggy-dinner-bowl-look' when interestsed, write 'field reports' up on the net, call talking to men 'fluffing', 'freeze out' men to make them more interested, think 'one-itis' is a disease or use 'yes-ladders'. Language moulds thought. If you use dehumanising terms for genuine human interaction, it becomes dehumanised. I'm all for flirting. I'm all for learning how to present your best self, I'm all for makeovers where you look and feel better. One of my favourite programmes on UK TV was 'Would like to meet' where a confidence coach, style coach and relationship coach worked with someone for 6 weeks to help them date. It was wonderful watching people blossom and develop the confidence to interact genuinely with people.