[sognorealta]

I've enjoyed all of the articles that I've read on your website...still lots left to read

The light/darkworkers article got to me in particular because of a situation at work that I have been straggling with for a few years and no matter what I do, it does not seem to permanently improve, only temporally..

I have been working in my current post for a few years now. A colleague of mine seems to be unable to stop gossipping about people, stretching the truth, getting involved in people business and so on. However, she always does it with a smile, pretending to be concerned when in reality she simply wants to be above everybody else. To be fair, she is also fun, loud, organises drinks, outing and all that.. I have been asking myself why do I take it so personally, I never understood why I feel so energy-less when in her close company and further more, I know that she feels threatened by me as I am always and the only one that does not get involved in her silliness and generally I speak well about people, even if I don't particularly like them...I don't have to like anyone but I do have to respect people as they are, don't believe in judging and support and help everyone (but can't do it with this particular person or maybe I just can't let go).

I've tried everything, smiling more, complement her on her look when she looks particularly nice, got her a present for her birthday (although I was the only one that was not invited to her birthday).

The result is always the same, she's smiling, seems lovely and interested in what I do and soon enough she would say something to put me down (always smiling) or she would mentioned some ex friends of mine, people that she does not know well and she would takes their side although she does not know what happened!

I can't avoid her because she works with me and we all generally get on with each other at work. The only way I can avoid her is by not socialising with my work mates anymore. Why should I do that? I like my work mates; however it is just too much!

Your article has been a mind opener...I am a lightworker and she is a darkworker. How else can I explain that feeling of emptiness I have when in her company, anger, frustration....sometimes I don't seems to be able to stop thinking about it, which in turn drains me of my energy even further and worsen the situation.

Now, subjective reality! Have I created her? I must have had. I am confused and fed up of it all. Why have I chosen someone like that in my life? I feel so drained by this! How can I win? And why do I seem to be the only one that affected by it?

Sogno