I was like that when I first started dating my bf. He tried reinforcing me but I'd just argue with him about what an awful person I was. Then one day he actually agreed with me. "Yeah, you're right, you really are just a lazy, talentless hack." I was like, WHAT?! It really hurt. I cried for hours. He said to me, "That is exactly how I feel every time you say things like that about yourself. Cut it out!"
For the most part it worked. But the ugly monster still rears its head. Especially when we argue.
I think in some cases of low self esteem, it's because you honestly believe you have control over your life. Or maybe you're a perfectionist. So if you make a mistake, or your life sucks, or whatnot, then it's your fault. If circumstances dictate that there's really nothing you could have done about it, then instead of saying, "Oh well, I'm in a pickle about this -- guess I'll rough it out" -- you think to yourself, "If I was X, Y, Z, I wouldn't be in this pickle! I'm an inherently flawed human being."
Other times it's easier to blame yourself than confront someone else.
Seriously, with the Law of Attraction and everything else -- if something in your life isn't going right, it's really all your fault. For not having the attitude if nothing else.
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~ Elaine.
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