The stories I've read here are nothing short of astounding. There's a lot of personal pain and it's refreshing to see people share it so willingly.
My personal story isn't all that new. Tough, at-times-verbally abusive, overly restrictive and angry father helped shape me into a socially inept, unconfident person. Was scared to make him mad. Never got anywhere because of it. I'm still feeling the effects of it. I'm 21 and living with my mom, and I hate it and I'm working hard to get out of it and make it on my own.
He died in August 2004 from liver related problems. Talk about opening the floodgates. After a tremendous bout of depression (which I think he didn't deserve one whit, but it happened), I finally decided I was sick of being a loser and here I am now, working to be the best man I can be.
I won't lie-I want to be better than him. I want to be kind, courteous, compassionate. I have his temper. That's not going to be tolerated for much longer. I'm admittedly self-centered. But I'm going to change. I want to be better and I'm going to be. I've already made progress and I'm not going to stop.
My story's not really shameful after all, I guess. More like "let's get dangerous".
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