Quote:
Originally Posted by dominick  If an SO isn't concerned about either of those then I would argue that they love the other person less rather than more. Weight gain also has very severe consequences health wise as one gets older. If you truly love your SO you should want to live a long, healthy life together. |
I've hesitated to answer because I myself have put on 20 or 30 lbs since my SO and I have been together. For me, at 5'9", it's not a huge amount, althought seeing it in writing makes me cringe. In my case, my SO is a bit overweight too and is a fabulous cook which is how I got here in the first place!
He likes the extra butt and thighs (and I'm fine with it too as I'm not well endowed up top at all
). We could both do without the pudgy tummy.
I don't take issue with your preference for a slim partner, and especially not for your desire to have a healthy one. But your comments I've quoted don't ring true to me. There's no should, nothing that proves she loves you. The line "if you love me you would..." is sticky territory. It implies one must follow a certain set of rules to show a person they love them. Her weight gain is not an affront to you so don't take it personally or as a sign that she doesn't care. "Shoulds" are relationship killers!
Good luck with figuring out how to approach her about this. I find it's a heated topic even though I know that my SO loves me despite my weight gain, precisely because I feel so badly about it myself.