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Rose of Cairo: ... You are disputing claims about what women in general tend to be attracted to with anecdotal evidence about what you personally like. You are a very unique and wonderful person, and I'm sure we're all interested in how to sweep you off your feet, but you are not every woman.
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Great point -- we can both be right. Just as most men may indeed prefer big boobs, I just... don't. Never have. Still, if you're gonna play the odds...
FWIW, I've seen the "leader of friends" thing first-hand and it is rock-me-back-in-my-chair astoundingly successful. And it deserves to be -- if you're providing a lot of social value (social/professional networking, emotional support, event coordination, etc.) for a lot a friends, that's a pretty cool thing! I think the reason it "works" is that the woman gets lots and lots of subcommunicated reinforcement from the friends that this is indeed a pretty good guy.
I think I've said this before, but I really think being attracted to behavior/personality is more admirable than being attracted to appearance, and yet... that's just how I'm wired.