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Mattsea · 12-10-2008, 07:35 PM

Angela,

Thanks for your response. It made good sense to me, and made me feel that I am coming from a self-centered viewpoint. I have been looking at her as being the problem and not myself. When in reality it is me who has changed. I made the commitment to marry her because I wanted to cut off any other possibility that we wouldn't be together. By bringing that possibility back in, I think I am focusing more on the problems instead of the solutions. She has cut off that possibility and was able to immediately focus on solutions despite what I said to her.

I recently read Steve's article on self-discipline and willpower, and used the concept of using willpower to extremely alter my environment to make it more conducive to productivity. I believe now would be a good time to come up with a massive plan to alter my environment so it is more conducive to thinking with empathy and acting out of love. I may not feel completely committed right now, but I am beginning to realize that is where I need to be and these thoughts are temporary and can be defeated.

What would be some good ideas for altering my self and my environment to help my marriage and to act with greater empathy? ill see if I can find anything that Steve wrote that can help.

thanks again. time to brainstorm.

12-10-2008, 07:35 PM	#4 (permalink)
Mattsea Junior Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Seattle Posts: 4	Angela, Thanks for your response. It made good sense to me, and made me feel that I am coming from a self-centered viewpoint. I have been looking at her as being the problem and not myself. When in reality it is me who has changed. I made the commitment to marry her because I wanted to cut off any other possibility that we wouldn't be together. By bringing that possibility back in, I think I am focusing more on the problems instead of the solutions. She has cut off that possibility and was able to immediately focus on solutions despite what I said to her. I recently read Steve's article on self-discipline and willpower, and used the concept of using willpower to extremely alter my environment to make it more conducive to productivity. I believe now would be a good time to come up with a massive plan to alter my environment so it is more conducive to thinking with empathy and acting out of love. I may not feel completely committed right now, but I am beginning to realize that is where I need to be and these thoughts are temporary and can be defeated. What would be some good ideas for altering my self and my environment to help my marriage and to act with greater empathy? ill see if I can find anything that Steve wrote that can help. thanks again. time to brainstorm.