Didn't fully understand your post. You get anxious when a lucid dream starts?
Had this problem before i started reading about LDs. Had very limited experiences with LDs similar to yours (1/year, only a few seconds). I got anxious and therefore the dream stopped. For example i was thinking: What if i am sleepwalking around while being in this state? Now having read that your body is paralyzed during dream phases this is not a problem anymore and i can enjoy the lucid phase as long as i am capable to (several minutes).
Attaining lucidity? I am no expert by far (just started recently, not even have a dream journal yet).
What worked so far for me:
- The wake back to bed - method
Wake Back to Bed (WBTB) - Dream Views Lucid Dreaming Forum
- Reading about LDs (recommendation: LaBerge - Exploring the world of lucid dreaming)
- Looking forward to having a LD when going to sleep