[Farryn]

I too have parents at a lower level of consciousness and I find it extremely difficult to communicate with them. As I developed more independence (I'm 24), I wanted to develop a closer relationship with my parents but every time I spoke to them I felt drained, frustrated, and sad. In each conversation I could see how domesticated they were, and I could pick out the negative/restrictive beliefs that had programmed me as a child. I had to (and still have to!) be very aware to be able fight their beliefs away from my consciousness. I'm in counselling to help rid myself of most of the negative beliefs but I still have a long way to go to be completely free of all the destructive beliefs I learnt as a child.

I have now unfortunately made the counscious decision not to have very deep conversations with my parents. I see them and smile, tell them I love them, say "how are you?", but it hardly goes beyond that. I hope one day that we'll be able to have the close relationship that I've wanted, but for now, until I get strong enough that their beliefs don't affect me or lower my mood, I feel that I'll have to avoid any deep or lengthy interactions with them. I have no idea how they feel about this distance, or if they've even noticed, but I do know that as long as each time they see me I'm happy and busy, they're happy.