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Dev · 10-25-2008, 09:22 AM

My wife & I have a disagreement. She wants a 2nd child (my first child is 8 years old) & I don't want anymore. My view is that since I am the only earning member(age 35) in the family my income is just about sufficient to take care of her,my son,my mother, my dependent sister & her daughter(both are staying with us). I want to save enough for their higher education & marriage. Higher education & Marriage are two major expenses & eat up most of our savings in our society.
My wife's (and most of the elders) view is that one must always have a second child. They say parents can only give birth to a child, his/her destiny is in the hands of God. I differ on this.
We always have a small fight on this & end up sulking. I'm not able to convince her because I am not sure if she(and all our elders) are right after all. Majority of my colleagues & friends have opted for only 1 child because they are not sure if they can take proper care of the 2nd one. Those have more than 1 kid are either rich, believe in the destiny theory or accidentally(un-planned is the right word) conceived.
I want to treat my niece(she is 13) as my own daughter(her father does not stay with us), but my wife does not really like my sister & niece (there are no major fights on any issue). I am afraid to ask my wife to treat my niece as our daughter & stop having this idea of a second child. Should I tell her this? Our marriage has been OK so far but I find that we are not on the same wave-length.
I want to resolve this issue once & for all.
Friends, I need your guidance.

10-25-2008, 09:22 AM	#1 (permalink)
Dev Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Mumbai, India Posts: 194	Who is right? My wife & I have a disagreement. She wants a 2nd child (my first child is 8 years old) & I don't want anymore. My view is that since I am the only earning member(age 35) in the family my income is just about sufficient to take care of her,my son,my mother, my dependent sister & her daughter(both are staying with us). I want to save enough for their higher education & marriage. Higher education & Marriage are two major expenses & eat up most of our savings in our society. My wife's (and most of the elders) view is that one must always have a second child. They say parents can only give birth to a child, his/her destiny is in the hands of God. I differ on this. We always have a small fight on this & end up sulking. I'm not able to convince her because I am not sure if she(and all our elders) are right after all. Majority of my colleagues & friends have opted for only 1 child because they are not sure if they can take proper care of the 2nd one. Those have more than 1 kid are either rich, believe in the destiny theory or accidentally(un-planned is the right word) conceived. I want to treat my niece(she is 13) as my own daughter(her father does not stay with us), but my wife does not really like my sister & niece (there are no major fights on any issue). I am afraid to ask my wife to treat my niece as our daughter & stop having this idea of a second child. Should I tell her this? Our marriage has been OK so far but I find that we are not on the same wave-length. I want to resolve this issue once & for all. Friends, I need your guidance.