Personal Development for Smart People Forums - View Single Post - I seem to have a hard time making friends/connections with people

Parthon · 10-23-2008, 06:03 AM

I just thought about how I manage to make so many friends. These are some points that could help:

Be interesting: This doesn't mean make up stuff about yourself to seem interesting, but just present yourself as an interesting person. I'm a very well read person, on all kinds of topics, so I always have something to talk about, and if you can talk about what they are interested in, then you are automatically interesting.

Be interested: Don't just listen, smile and nod. Really cherish what the other person has to say, and respond to what they mean. Nothing validates another person more than actually listening to and understanding them.

Be friendly: Say "Hi", "How's it going?" and "Wassup?". Smile with your eyes, and genuinely enjoy meeting people. This doesn't mean being nice, it means that you just like meeting new people and are someone who people can enjoy meeting.

Be funny: This doesn't mean be a comedian, but to look at the funny in each situation. You personally might not find a joke funny, but you can learn to see why other people do. The more you learn to find the humour everywhere, the easier it is to bring it into conversations. Rehearsed jokes only take you so far, situational jokes and witty one liners are much better.

I think you can learn to get friends, much like any other skill, but it comes down to being yourself, and being the best self you can be.

10-23-2008, 06:03 AM	#9 (permalink)
Parthon Family Member Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Perth, Australia Posts: 1,532	I just thought about how I manage to make so many friends. These are some points that could help: Be interesting: This doesn't mean make up stuff about yourself to seem interesting, but just present yourself as an interesting person. I'm a very well read person, on all kinds of topics, so I always have something to talk about, and if you can talk about what they are interested in, then you are automatically interesting. Be interested: Don't just listen, smile and nod. Really cherish what the other person has to say, and respond to what they mean. Nothing validates another person more than actually listening to and understanding them. Be friendly: Say "Hi", "How's it going?" and "Wassup?". Smile with your eyes, and genuinely enjoy meeting people. This doesn't mean being nice, it means that you just like meeting new people and are someone who people can enjoy meeting. Be funny: This doesn't mean be a comedian, but to look at the funny in each situation. You personally might not find a joke funny, but you can learn to see why other people do. The more you learn to find the humour everywhere, the easier it is to bring it into conversations. Rehearsed jokes only take you so far, situational jokes and witty one liners are much better. I think you can learn to get friends, much like any other skill, but it comes down to being yourself, and being the best self you can be.