Quote:
Originally Posted by joyseeker  How do you get the upper hand back, or get the control back in the dating game?
It seems like dating is constant back and forth game of who is in control. I don't know why "playing hard to get" works, but it does!. With me it seems like while I am in the " I want to get to know you better" phase the guy adores me and will do anything to get my attention. (and I'm playing hard to get) Once I finally realize -hey I really do like this guy, it is to late and he is on his way out. (he's playing hard to get now ) So, I find myself trying to get their attention and hating how everything is reversed on me.
How do you get them back with out looking to desperate for them to give you another chance? ( I've lost the game numerous times, but I really don't want to lose this one  )
-thanks for the advise |
It sounds like you've got an unhealthy perspective on relationships. Sounds relationships of any sort should not be about winning or losing (or trapping or manipulating). It should be about openness, honesty, trust, and compatibility.
I would never again want to be involved in a relationship with a girl who figured out a way to control or manipulate me into being with her. It's definitely not good for me but it's also not good for her.
My best advice to you, joyseeker, would be to take this as a learning experience, reflect on your actions and their results, and take these learnings and move forward. I would also advise you to seek counsel from older and wiser women who've been in long-standing successful relationships. They can help you develop yourself so that you can ultimately find the perfect relationship for you.