In my experience, the only way to regain control (or as I would call it, "empowerment") is to become "stubbornly authentic."
In other words, being myself... no matter whether that's good or bad... and whenever another person gets upset or rejects my authenticity, I am STUBBORN about continuing to be authentic.
If another person cannot handle who I truly am, then we're just not a good fit. Sure, I don't like being rejected -- and I spent 20 years experiencing some of the worst kinds of rejection imagineable -- but at the end of the day, I'd rather be authentic and rejected, than living a lie just trying to be accepted.
And ANY time we are not being authentic, we are living a lie. Maybe a small lie. Maybe a little white lie. Maybe we aren't even aware we're living a lie. But if I'm not being authentic... then I'm being inauthentic.
So my advice is simply this: Be you, and let other people be them. If you align well, then the dating game is no game at all... but it is very playful.
