Quote:
Originally Posted by ScotiaCoast  As far back as grade four, I can remember being a perfectionist in everything school-related. In high school I frequently stayed up all night studying or trying to perfect assignments that I had usually put off until the last minute. Although last minute, I would get a rush of energy and feel motivated to perform well. Usually it was worth it, and my grades reflected my strives for 'perfection'. And then university hit. I still leave assignments until the last minute (in spite of attending more than one procrastination/time management workshop), but instead of feeling an adrenaline rush and push to stay up all night (or any time of day) working on assignments to get good grades, I now just feel drained, apathetic, and can't see the point in putting any effort into attempting to complete the work. For some reason, the mix of procrastination/perfectionism went from working to my advantage (or at least letting me get by alright), to putting me at a complete disadvantage. Whenever I have work to do, in spite of a waning desire to perform well so that I can eventually get into professional programmes, I feel mentally (and sometimes physically) choked and my reserve of motivation seems to have run dry. The pileup of assignments and commitments leave me feeling paralysed, like I can't do anything. Others tell me to just do the work. I tell myself to just do the work, and even though I know I can (I did in my past, so why not now?), I won't. I feel confused, frustrated, and tired of letting other people and myself (or at least the person I used to be) down. I realise this is likely a perfectionism and mindset thing, but I just don't know where to go from here. |
First thing first. You have a adopted a pattern on dealing with things till the last minute and I think that you are drained out because of this.
Have you notice some other people are always so relax in exams and eventually get very good grades for it? They are breaking down the revision of the subjects into bite size nuggets and is practicing everyday for maybe 30min or an hour. This ensures that the pressure would not be overwhelming for them when the exam deadline is near and the workload could be unbearable if you want to revise for it in a shot. Read more on
baby steps here.
Perfectionism is a perfect tool for destroying action. Sometimes it is good to start with imperfection. Only when you start, the energy you focus on the project at hand will gather momentum and thus crushing procrastination. You can read this
article on procrastination