About two years ago I was living in halls at university. After a drunken night out at a club, I brought back an equally drunk girl. There was no seeming connection between us. I was horny, she was.. probably horny, maybe liked the attention? I don't know. This was one in a line of many at the time and I didn't care what she thought she liked about me.
So after I had satiated my Freudian subconscious
, I saw her more clearly. With the desire gone, all I saw was a pointless, loveless act, and as I saw it at the time, an annoying bimbo in my bed. I was suitably annoyed, depressed and disgusted.
I told her to stop pestering me and go to sleep. I couldn't wait until morning so I could cleanse my room of the memories of that degradation, and I went to my laptop and read my first articles on polarity that I'd come across on Steve's website. At that time I was very much darkworker polarised -- more than most people will ever experience. Maybe you can tell by the attitudes I've expressed? Suitably inspired by "the dark side" and unwilling to try to sleep with drunken, pestering bimbo in my bed I turned to Star Wars to get me through to the morning. I watched episode II and then episode III and the sheer purity those movies seemed to express to me, actually made me cry. I'm not the crying type! I was so disgusted with what I'd just experienced that Star Wars seemed to have the purity of springs first blossom, in my addled state of mind.
That was one of my weirdest nights ever, not because of what happened but because of the range of emotions I went through. It was totally bizarre and reading Steve's book today somehow reminded me of it. Strange. I hope you enjoyed that slide of my odd little world. Nighty night.