Personal Development for Smart People Forums - View Single Post

estudiant9 · 10-15-2008, 06:32 AM

Hi, this doesn't neatly fall within any one category but...here it goes.

I've always thought it'd be kind of cool to completely shave my head. Not as a daily thing, but just to do it and see what it feels like.
I know that shaving one's head can be symbolic of new beginnings, resolution, etc, particularly in East Asia where many Buddhist monks have shaven heads as a sign of asceticism and discipline.

Here's my problem: I've always wanted to do well in school, be productive with my time, be a hard worker, be on the success track. I want to be good at doing school to a point where I can juggle my academic responsibilities and a social life. The fact is that both aspects of my life are down in the dumps at the moment. I have a 2.47 GPA (would be lower but for some slack courses during summer school), probably will finish this semester at about the same level barring some dramatic improvements. As far as social life, without exaggeration I can say that I have one friend (who is a borderline acquaintance). Never had a girlfriend. I'm a 22-year-old junior in college (dropped out of/switched schools a couple times).

I've always given so easily to distractions. Internet (a BIG one), movies, TV shows, self-help books, people-watching in the library, ping pong, even part-time jobs (which I to my dismay often turn to as an excuse for lack of quality study time). Most of these are solitary activities, so it's not like I'm at least training to be a social magnet at the expense of grades.

I have about 7 weeks left this semester. I want to use this time to approach my academic work with reckless abandon and completely change my study habits, and totally focus on getting my academic life on track, which would be the foundation for every other area of my life. Use the Overwhelming Force, as Mr. Pavlina would put it. By doing something drastic (for me) like shaving my head and having that be a daily reminder of what I want to achieve, I'm hoping to create habits that will stick, for a change. Because this is a big change I'm talking about, for someone who barely has had two full productive days in his entire life.

Here's my hesitation: I realize how much attachment I have to having my hair, or having good, socially approved looks. At the risk of sounding like an idiot, I'm considered quite a head-turner, and very attractive girls who have never spoken a word to me aggressively approach me all the time on campus purely based on my looks. I've head comments on how nice and thick my hair is, both from girls and straight guys. Imagine how desperately and happily my ego jumps on this kind of attention when it has basically nothing else! I actually tend to be quite awkward and shy in new and familiar situations, and have had longstanding issues with anxiety and being paranoid (again, probably why I've never had a girlfriend at 22, going on 23 fast).

Shaving my head will greatly diminish my attractiveness, to say the least. I actually look pretty funny even with short hair, because I have a weird shaped head which can masked when my hair is medium length or longer. I know for sure that my self-esteem is going to nosedive for quite some time. My fear is that while I'm working on my academics. I'll probably miss lots and lots of opportunities to improve my social life (which I consider second in importance to academics, but also VERY important) during this pretty critical period of my life, college. I'm only going to be here for another year or so, and 2 months is a LONG time in a college timetable whether you have 6 months or 4 years left. I'm just about to hit it off with a couple girls as well, and again, I want to create something here before it's too late.

I know this all could sound incredibly silly, but anyway...If I'm going to do it, I'm going to do it this coming Sunday. My question in short is, in attempting to get my academic life on track and create a future for myself, am I just distracting myself by going through the fuss of changing my physical features and putting myself through needless and silly worries? Or do you think this is a legitimate and potentially effective way to go about a significant life change?

Thank you very much.

10-15-2008, 06:32 AM	#1 (permalink)
estudiant9 Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 49	Should I shave my head? Hi, this doesn't neatly fall within any one category but...here it goes. I've always thought it'd be kind of cool to completely shave my head. Not as a daily thing, but just to do it and see what it feels like. I know that shaving one's head can be symbolic of new beginnings, resolution, etc, particularly in East Asia where many Buddhist monks have shaven heads as a sign of asceticism and discipline. Here's my problem: I've always wanted to do well in school, be productive with my time, be a hard worker, be on the success track. I want to be good at doing school to a point where I can juggle my academic responsibilities and a social life. The fact is that both aspects of my life are down in the dumps at the moment. I have a 2.47 GPA (would be lower but for some slack courses during summer school), probably will finish this semester at about the same level barring some dramatic improvements. As far as social life, without exaggeration I can say that I have one friend (who is a borderline acquaintance). Never had a girlfriend. I'm a 22-year-old junior in college (dropped out of/switched schools a couple times). I've always given so easily to distractions. Internet (a BIG one), movies, TV shows, self-help books, people-watching in the library, ping pong, even part-time jobs (which I to my dismay often turn to as an excuse for lack of quality study time). Most of these are solitary activities, so it's not like I'm at least training to be a social magnet at the expense of grades. I have about 7 weeks left this semester. I want to use this time to approach my academic work with reckless abandon and completely change my study habits, and totally focus on getting my academic life on track, which would be the foundation for every other area of my life. Use the Overwhelming Force, as Mr. Pavlina would put it. By doing something drastic (for me) like shaving my head and having that be a daily reminder of what I want to achieve, I'm hoping to create habits that will stick, for a change. Because this is a big change I'm talking about, for someone who barely has had two full productive days in his entire life. Here's my hesitation: I realize how much attachment I have to having my hair, or having good, socially approved looks. At the risk of sounding like an idiot, I'm considered quite a head-turner, and very attractive girls who have never spoken a word to me aggressively approach me all the time on campus purely based on my looks. I've head comments on how nice and thick my hair is, both from girls and straight guys. Imagine how desperately and happily my ego jumps on this kind of attention when it has basically nothing else! I actually tend to be quite awkward and shy in new and familiar situations, and have had longstanding issues with anxiety and being paranoid (again, probably why I've never had a girlfriend at 22, going on 23 fast). Shaving my head will greatly diminish my attractiveness, to say the least. I actually look pretty funny even with short hair, because I have a weird shaped head which can masked when my hair is medium length or longer. I know for sure that my self-esteem is going to nosedive for quite some time. My fear is that while I'm working on my academics. I'll probably miss lots and lots of opportunities to improve my social life (which I consider second in importance to academics, but also VERY important) during this pretty critical period of my life, college. I'm only going to be here for another year or so, and 2 months is a LONG time in a college timetable whether you have 6 months or 4 years left. I'm just about to hit it off with a couple girls as well, and again, I want to create something here before it's too late. I know this all could sound incredibly silly, but anyway...If I'm going to do it, I'm going to do it this coming Sunday. My question in short is, in attempting to get my academic life on track and create a future for myself, am I just distracting myself by going through the fuss of changing my physical features and putting myself through needless and silly worries? Or do you think this is a legitimate and potentially effective way to go about a significant life change? Thank you very much.