Quote:
Originally Posted by Parthon  That's awesome richie! Great to hear that you had such a breakthrough on such a difficult area of life. 
ps, what was your secret? |
Recovery had its own story, no secret though.
It was my first love experience and my emotional nature made it a real hell for me. After breaking all the contacts with her, I felt life has no meaning and I am the biggest looser, I even felt like love has no meaning and its pure waste.
At first, I didnt do anything except going out with some friends and smoke 20 Cancer sticks a day and lots of vodka.
This continued for a month, I didnt feel any interest in dating, but formed a new group of all those who did nothing except, smoking and drugging themselves. I distant myself from my close freinds, because they reminded me of 'the girl'. After forming this new group I started just enjoying myself by lowering my conciousness. failed in few of my subjects and also my business was at its lowest, It made loss for two monts consecutively and I didnt even discover until a few months. During that phase I understood lots of new people. Earlier I would have discarded this people as just lazy unfocused bumps with no goal in life and would never even be friends with them, but I discovered every individual has his own story which leads them to where they are in their life. I had no plans for coming out of it nor bringing any change in myself or them. I enjoyed the unfocused view of life, I learned guitar and stuff and discovered how music can change your moods drastically. I was the worst drinker of all, I hardly got drunk with 'old monk' or tequila's, all i did was bet everyone in drinking challenge and get drinks for free.
(Obviously no one was ready to bet later hehe)
We organised some cool events, which turned out to be a hit in our local region, we also sold some second hand cars to get some extra cash. We had some fights with other groups and all the rubbish you can think of. But I had lots of fun in that too. My Social skills improved really good, I never though twice talking to a girl. (most of the girls I found in that phase were dull and dumb, yet beautiful) I also transformed myself to a jerk from a geek.
Though I enjoyed with them initially, later I felt like a big part of me missing, I started to miss my old self. before this phase I was really immature about life, being carefree helped me see the Bigger picture that life is not all about earning good grade's. But I missed how high self esteem I had, how determined and confident I was about my life.
I thought of transforming, Read some PD books, read the Steve's blog and forums. First thing I did after two months was to leave Cancer Sticks, started with 7 day trial, then 30days and then 6 months, where I left it completely. Reduced taking alcohol during that process too. Started my early jogging as I used to do early. Started being active in studies and business. Though I kept contact with my 'New Group' I also started being good friends with my old buddies. Watching me 2 of my friends also left ciggerates.
Slowly due to less time I forgot everything abt the girl and all I did was work, study and socialise.
The girl I had feelings failed in exams and had to take a 'Drop' of one year.
I found a very smart and beautiful girl in my class. I felt trmendous attraction and started usual talking [My Social skills I learned during my bad phase helped me so tremendously] I started attending all my classes and workhard. [Initially, I did this only to meet that new girl Daily
]
I started enjoying my work and also studies, I loved my juggling and also my highly expanded social nature helped me to keep me entertained.
I slowly came in track of my life and started dating the new girl.
I concentrated heavily in business and promised myself to take care of it. I also started taking a lot of care of my family and old friends, I discovered love is not only romantic but it has various colurs and natures.
I also made a short film with my friends for a contest and won the second prize, it helped me express myself creatively. I became a Good hearted and confident strong indiviual, a higher level of Jerk and Geek,
My funky group is still the same but my point of view towards them has changed a lot. I know they are the ones as steve said leaving there dog free and not giving directions, just to enjoy life as it comes. I dont see them as waste anymore, while I still give direction to my Dog and keep it on path But I also let it free sometimes.
Life is really fun and its really what we make it, dont allow anyone to spoil the amazing experience. Every feeling of pain is the seed of new discovery.
