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Originally Posted by oBakasan  I think this point from the wikipedia article shows what I meant when I said that there's something missing from the theory.
Even if the man is in control, it is only because the woman allowed him to be in control and she could revoke that right at any time (e.g. break up) therefore showing that the woman has just as much control over what's happening as the man.
Therefore what you describe as "control" is more of an "illusion of control". |
Yeees... you have a point, but that's the whole thing, it's not a rational process, it's instinct drive and feeling. Of course both parties have control. And of course both minds can be agreeing or disagreeing or making pacts or drawing up contracts. But at a bodily or lower-mind level that's how the power wants to flow. You can see it in the way a woman's body curls up and becomes yielding as she gets turned on while the man becomes straight and erect. Go watch some porn movies if you need convincing
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It's not a question of negative connotations, it's a question of the word's actual meaning.
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I differ on that... a word can mean a million subtly different things. What's important, unless you like long pointless arguments, is not to see what you think what the word should mean but rather where the speaker is coming from as he says it. As they say "the finger pointing at the moon is not the moon". Words are only pointers to meaning.
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Which of course has nothing to do with your original proposition. Protecting and wanting to be protected have nothing to do with control. In fact it could be argued that since it's the man whose going out of his way to protect the woman, it's the woman who has the most control between the two.
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You're talking about different sorts of control. As I was saying it's a sort of instinctual power like the pecking order in a pack of animals, etc. A women allowing a man to protect her is submitting to strength. That's how this energy flows.