Hi everyone,
I'm really hoping to get some outside perspective on my situation as I'm feeling irrational and overly sensitive due to PMS - not the best frame of mind to make decisions! I would really appreciate hearing your thoughts on the matter...
I've been seeing a Spanish guy for a few months now and have known him for almost a year. We have such fun together, he really makes me smile and we always have loads to talk about all the time. I really feel like we are on the same wavelength and he stimulates me on an intellectual level very much
It has been ages (about 5 years) since I've have such strong feelings for someone. I am 30 and he is 27 and he has just finished full time education (cinematography/editing) and I have spent alot of my years working and travelling the world. I have been in many relationships in my life and he has had very few. I am open about my feelings and he is not so - he gets embarrassed with talk like that, but I know he cares about me alot. He is currently in Spain as he went on a one month holiday and is due back soon. I keep getting these feelings that as much as I love him, maybe I should not be wasting time with someone who is in such a different place to me in life. He hasn't experienced nearly as much as me and is yet to discover the world and maybe other people in the relationship sense. It makes me feel scared of getting hurt and part of me wants to pull away now so that I don't waste time and lose my dignity in the meantime. Just the thought of splitting up with him breaks my heart though. I keep saying to myself to take each day as it comes and love with all my heart and stop being so paranoid but I can't help it. I know it could work against all odds but I have niggling doubt now and again.
On top of that we don't live very near each other (about 2 hours away by bus and train) and I saw a message from one of his housemates in London on his Facebook profile and it said are you coming straight back here or going directly to LA????? That has put me really on edge! I don't know if it's a joke or really he's been offered something abroad and is likely to leave soon.
I feel so upset. I don't want to say anything to him now and I don't want to let him know that I read this message on his facebook profile - maybe it's best to wait for him to come back to England and speak to him when I see him next weekend.
Love can be such a painful game
Thanks for listening!
x