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mattpd · 10-03-2008, 01:54 AM

Hey this is fairly common.

It usually means you are sexually repressed.

Lots of the guys I help with dating are massively sexually repressed, its a very common problem.

I helped a guy last year who was a virgin at 23, and he was extremely scared of sex, and stds, and all that stuff. Through some coaching we managed to get him some sexual action and he totally freaked out.

He wore a condom, the girl was on the pill, and he was terrified he had caught AIDS, or got her pregnant, and I had like 20 missed calls on my phone at 3am. He got a friend who was a chemist over straight away, and he was peaking out completely, and he put the girl through hell actually.

For the next week or two he was a nervous wreck, he expected the worst, and he visited like 3 doctors for different opinions. This actually repeated on the next 2 or 3 women he had sex with, and he kept totally freaking out about it.

He's okay with it now, but it was a combination of a few things that caused it. Firstly, mostly his Mum is to blame. She is very sexually conservative, and I don't think she has had sex for about 10 years, well, I actually know she hasn't because he told me.

And also, he's an extremely risk adverse guy. He's not the type to go do anything dangerous or speed in his car if you know what I mean. And he had a very sheltered upbringing, not really in with the 'in' crowd if you know what I mean. He didn't date at school, or have girls, or get sexually active until much later. He had barely kissed a girl when I met him, had never been on a date.

And he's also prone to worry, and suffer anxiety, and has a pretty negative mental attitude.

Now you may not be as bad as this guy, who had a complete freak-out with sex, and imagined the worst things possible, but you can learn from him.

First of all, realize it has nothing to do with sex, or STDs, or anything like that, but it has to do with you. These types of fears are not normal, and not healthy, and will limit your ability to have an enjoyable life. The best way is to have more sex, and to get comfortable with your sexuality.

Forget porn, but read some books on sex, and talk to more people about sex. Become a more sexual guy. It could also be that you are prone to anxiety, so many consider some hypnotherapy, or neurofeedback, or maybe some sexual counseling.

Sexual repression really sucks, I suffered from it a bit, and it can really mess up your interactions with women.

10-03-2008, 01:54 AM	#4 (permalink)
mattpd Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 143	Hey this is fairly common. It usually means you are sexually repressed. Lots of the guys I help with dating are massively sexually repressed, its a very common problem. I helped a guy last year who was a virgin at 23, and he was extremely scared of sex, and stds, and all that stuff. Through some coaching we managed to get him some sexual action and he totally freaked out. He wore a condom, the girl was on the pill, and he was terrified he had caught AIDS, or got her pregnant, and I had like 20 missed calls on my phone at 3am. He got a friend who was a chemist over straight away, and he was peaking out completely, and he put the girl through hell actually. For the next week or two he was a nervous wreck, he expected the worst, and he visited like 3 doctors for different opinions. This actually repeated on the next 2 or 3 women he had sex with, and he kept totally freaking out about it. He's okay with it now, but it was a combination of a few things that caused it. Firstly, mostly his Mum is to blame. She is very sexually conservative, and I don't think she has had sex for about 10 years, well, I actually know she hasn't because he told me. And also, he's an extremely risk adverse guy. He's not the type to go do anything dangerous or speed in his car if you know what I mean. And he had a very sheltered upbringing, not really in with the 'in' crowd if you know what I mean. He didn't date at school, or have girls, or get sexually active until much later. He had barely kissed a girl when I met him, had never been on a date. And he's also prone to worry, and suffer anxiety, and has a pretty negative mental attitude. Now you may not be as bad as this guy, who had a complete freak-out with sex, and imagined the worst things possible, but you can learn from him. First of all, realize it has nothing to do with sex, or STDs, or anything like that, but it has to do with you. These types of fears are not normal, and not healthy, and will limit your ability to have an enjoyable life. The best way is to have more sex, and to get comfortable with your sexuality. Forget porn, but read some books on sex, and talk to more people about sex. Become a more sexual guy. It could also be that you are prone to anxiety, so many consider some hypnotherapy, or neurofeedback, or maybe some sexual counseling. Sexual repression really sucks, I suffered from it a bit, and it can really mess up your interactions with women.