Part of the problem is beliefs are dealt in sets and systems. The implication of any belief system is that if you have an experience the validates X, then Y and Z must also follow. Most people do not move on to seek the personal experience of Y or Z, or to discover what comes next.
Another part of the problem is the ego response gets tied up in both sides of the equation. On one hand, we don't want to feel bad about ourselves, which causes a reaction towards some beliefs. On the other hand, it doesn't seem natural that a single template can apply to all individuals.
So what we naturally do is ignore those parts that don't sit right with us because it makes the other parts easier. So we end up a fragmented person with fragmented faith. When we're looking at adjacent fragments we feel good, and when we're looking from one fragment into a separate fragment, the gap raises fear, despair, confusion, etc.
It does you no good to try to reconcile this through blind acceptance of any total system. Blind acceptance of a single idea lowers consciousness. This is not what is meant by faith; faith is exercising your ability to experience the truth of every idea. Experiencing the truth of a thing eliminates the fragment, creates oneness, wholeness of being. That experience is spirit-expanding, but looking for it is much harder than blind acceptance, much harder than following a list of behaviors, much harder than declaring a belief.
But no experience will bring you closer to god.
Good luck!
Andy
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