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Originally Posted by marklang500  I think I use these types of boards to get the esteem that I need. I think some of my posts are designed with ego in mind, wanting to show everyone how smart and cool I am, because out here in the real world, I'm beginning to lose my edge. LIke I said, I don't know where the spiral started, but in highschool and college I was the stud.
A gratitude journal would just be another distraction. I really need to get my work life together. The procreastination is sickening. Then the self esteem plummets, then I seek other forms of self-gratification, like posting in these forums, helping around the house, having a fulfilling sex life, volunteering at youth football....it's all a band-aid for a severely suffering work habit. And my work habit is how I support my family. So even though I am bringing in the paycheck, I know in my heart that I truely am not really providing for my family. I may really need a therepist. |
Yeah, I get it. Limiting self-beliefs have us scrambling to prove they're not true (like getting validation here on these boards about how smart and cool you are) and simultaneously scrambling to avoid people finding out they are true (like "getting your life together" so no one notices you are not good enough). It's just exhausting, like trying to dog-paddle in a vat full of pudding.
I think focusing on the band-aid is an upside-down approach, and that freeing yourself of the limiting belief is much more powerful and has much more velocity than slapping on band-aids. In that regard, I agree with you that a therapist or coach or other third-party might be valuable in helping you to shift into a more powerful stance. Just seeing things from a new perspective, alone, can make all the difference in being in love with your life.
By the way, what is it you would really love to provide for your family? I mean, a genie offers you three qualities or conditions that you can *poof* provide for your family, what would they be in an ideal world?