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...which is funny and baffling, because it is very clear to me that you are a person to be highly esteemed. Don't you deserve to be thought well of? Do reasons pop into your mind as to why you don't deserve your own support?
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I think I use these types of boards to get the esteem that I need. I think some of my posts are designed with ego in mind, wanting to show everyone how smart and cool I am, because out here in the real world, I'm beginning to lose my edge. LIke I said, I don't know where the spiral started, but in highschool and college I was the stud.
A gratitude journal would just be another distraction. I really need to get my work life together. The procreastination is sickening. Then the self esteem plummets, then I seek other forms of self-gratification, like posting in these forums, helping around the house, having a fulfilling sex life, volunteering at youth football....it's all a band-aid for a severely suffering work habit. And my work habit is how I support my family. So even though I am bringing in the paycheck, I know in my heart that I truely am not really providing for my family. I may really need a therepist.