I don't know whether it's because I'm approaching 40 but this question and everything it means has a real resonance right now. The problem is I haven't really got an answer that I'm comfortable with.
If we just talk about career for the moment I am having to face one the biggest, if not biggest decisions in my life. I've said before I need a change but what I do is pretty much all I know.
I need to strike out on my own but there is the fear of not providing for my family. Even if I did go I'm not clear what I would be offering to customers.
I've been looking at alternative employment in the areas that I'm most skilled in but I'm uninspired to a degree that's almost frightening. It's: 'No, I just don't want to do that'.
The positive thing is that this tells me to look elsewhere but this creates a gulf between my personal and family needs and level of ability at something else.
I will have to take the jump, I know I will but it's the direction I am unsure of right now.
I started my job five years ago as of tomorrow and for 3 1/2 years I've been thinking about leaving. I can't keep on thinking, I have to start doing.
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