Originally Posted by Acting Like Godot
It doesn't matter. The fact is that the "current" personal situation, whatever it is, is always changing.
For example, you have mentioned something about how your rape experience has affected your daughters. Let's say that today, it has affected them in X way. Well, in 20 years time, it could affect them:
(1) still in X way
(2) in Y way
(3) in Z way
(4) not at all
You have also mentioned that how your rape experience has affected your daughters has affected you. Let's say that today, you have been affected in P way.
Well, in 20 years time, it could affect you:
(1) still in P way
(2) in Q way
(3) in R way
(4) not at all
Again, applying the same reasoning, the 20-year situation might well materialise in 15 years, or 10 years, or 5 years, or in 1 year.
Or in six months, or three months, or next month, or next week.
Then the simple question I ask you is - would you like a more positive sort of outcome; or a more negative sort of outcome.
Next, I ask you - would you like that outcome to happen sooner, or later?
After that, I ask you - what can you possibly do, to help make that outcome happen sooner (or later). I would suggest to you that the answer has something to do with changing or adjusting your own thoughts.
Thankyou for your efforts. I have added more to my last post that perhaps you haven't seen. Maybe this will clarify.
Having said that and thought it over I realized that I had offered my experience of being raped to illustrate a point. I was not looking for help, analysis or sympathy. My point was to show how the experience had affected me and my family as opposed to how Angela's experience had affected her. Nothing else.
The experience and the impact of it wasn't up for dispute. The experience changed who I was. It changed my view of the world. It changed my sense of survival. It changed fundamental beliefs I had about myself and the world. It changed my view of sex. It changed my view of men. It made me afraid. It made me less than. All of this was growing more and more painful and I was suffering because I had nothing to replace it with. These are the things I think and speak of, not the rape.
The point is I did not choose to suffer and I do not choose it now. I have to rebuild myself and my world. I have to find a world view that I can live with and as yet nothing has changed. Women are still being raped. People are still being mugged. Worlds are crashing, cities are burning and disillusionment remains. So "I am alright Jack' type of attitude is an exception to the rule of change. It doesn't change anything. I hope this makes for better understanding. regards