Careful there, Maguru; rudeness is against the rules around here.
You want real examples of emotional suffering, as opposed to authentic pain? Let's see: one day I got mugged by some guys. It hurt! The next day, the authentic pain was gone, but my boyfriend suggested that it happened because of the way I was dressed, and the emotional suffering started to set in. I had all kinds of stories about how wrong he was for saying that, and how wrong men were for perpetrating violence against me, and how this and that .... but none of it was authentic pain. It was all pain that I was keeping alive by feeding myself stories. Talk about bull! And of course, when I stopped feeding myself the bull, the pain *poof!* disappeared.
You don't have to beg.
We disagree, that's all.
I'm sorry, but I thought YOU believed that. You don't? I'm sorry for the misunderstanding. Do you believe that suffering is NOT necessary, that it can be avoided, and that maybe it's undesirable?
In the way I referred to, EVERYONE is like Gene: everyone has the power to have a past and still be free of suffering. In many ways he is one of a kind! I believe the families you ask about can be free of suffering, not by adjusting it or not thinking about it, but by surrendering -- by
letting it go. Yes, people I love have died under tragic circumstances -- at least, it was a tragedy to me. But I'm not required to suffer because they died.
Right, I get that. EDIT: after thinking about this, I see that you are right: suffering is indeed "bearing pain." Bearing it, as in, lugging it around with you. What you bear, you can choose to put down.
They may not be JUST stories, but they are stories. Powerful ones, for some people. But stories. Yes, stories are our future, if we keep telling ourselves the same old stories. And yes, they are our legacy, if that's what we want to to leave for the next generation. There's a lot to learn from stories, but they don't determine how we feel -- WE do.
You delight me! Don't you know that? I will make it a point to say so more often. Delight is an emotion!
One of my favorites, as a matter of fact. I don't feel emotionally disconnected, but I guess I am emotionally disconnected from what you say and think -- nothing you say or do upsets me, I mean. Would you prefer me to get upset?