[The Cloud]

I figured out another piece of the puzzle today. It can be summed up in the words "I can't be happy." In a few more words, it's "As long as everybody is miserable, I can't be happy." According to this belief, most everybody is miserable and incapable of pulling themselves out of that misery. The whole world is sitting in a cesspool because it's just too stupid to look for a way out. People are ignorant, worthless scum, and I have to spend all my time trying to get their lead bottoms up out of the stinking hole that they're sitting in. Some people are smart enough to figure this out, but most of them are too stupid to even think that it's possible. And I can't be happy as long as anyone else isn't.

But then I thought about it, and I realized that I can't help these people. They are worthless by their own choice, and I can't help them against that. I'm free of them, because I can't help them. I can't stop them from being miserable, I can't stop them from wasting or destroying their lives, I can't make them realize that they deserve happiness and should search for a way to have it. I CAN'T! I'm utterly powerless, and no longer need to worry about the people I know that are throwing away their lives.

I know this isn't all there is. There's more that I need to figure out before I can truly and honestly live and believe the way I want to. But knowing where I am powerless is a big step in getting there.

(And for those of you that think that I'm being negative, look at the world around you. A lot of people ARE stupid. But they are stupid by choice. They are powerful in that they can be as stupid and miserable as they could ever want to be in their wildest dreams. And I have no power against their power to choose their own lives.)

*(upon further consideration, stupid probably isn't the best word. Confused, maybe? I dunno. Whatever it is, it's what they choose to be.)