The second thing, being confident in one situation and not in another, is situational confidence. That occurs when you allow external things to give you the sense of confidence. Actually, it should come from inside. For no reason. It's a default - you're BORN with it. But most of us lose it later in life, like say older childhood and young teen (at least for me and I've heard most others).
Anyway, external things become a crutch by which you allow yourself to feel good, in absence of the true sense of self - your core. So certain situations you allow yourself to feel confident, but it will go away when the situation disappears.
If you want a massive diatribe on what I just said, indulge yourself with this blog post (
Real Social Dynamics - Alex Attitude » Blog Archive » Who Are You?). I think this will answer all your questions. BTW allow yourself to feel the words in this entry here.
BTW I'm also attracted to the shy girls. It's similar to what you said. But I think generally as your confidence increases, unless you make a deliberate effort to the contrary, you'll naturally attract more confident people.
It's a natural progression, no lie. Don't stress over it
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