Quote:
Originally Posted by JirQUEST  I read the first page, and decided that the rest of the pages were too long for me to spend much time on it (when I could be self improving) 
I used to be like you, dude. I was really quiet, and even till today, I am not the noisiest in the group. But that's okay. I am fine with it. I think "be yourself" is THE appropriate answer. The problem is, most people are not being themselves. All this self improvement, after coming such a long way, has made me realise that it's not about becoming a better me, or however you want to say that. It is about removing the obstacles I see in front of me to becoming my true self.
That being said, it's great to see that you are taking action steps |
IMO a person alwasy is who they are, at their core. If a person is an introvert (I am) or shy (I am) or a loner (I am) - that is who the person is and it's okay to BE yourself, I agree because you can't be anything other then your core self but SmartAlx, you can enhance your personality.
I am still an introvert, shy and a loner who is not the brightest, funniest person at any gathering but through eagerness and desire, self help groups, attending a speaking and listening class and chiming in conversations even if I felt awkard thinking I had nothing of importance to add...I added my two cents anyway and found people were a lot more accepting of my comments that I ever imagined they would be. This is a process, not a magical moment of change but worth the effort.
I do think stepping out of the norm and using tools helps to increase confidance. But SmartAlx, maybe it would be good to take a break from analyzing others or finding reasons you have problems socializing or why women fall to the way side and concentrate on being yourself along with using tools to put a few cracks in your core and let some hidden aspects of yourself shine through.