I quit my job in March. I was working for a good company and a good boss and I worked with a lot of really great people. But the work was boring, the physical environment was extremely uncomfortable (very cold and dark) and I had a co-worker who I truly believed was a sociopath and he was influential enough over me that I had wanted to leave the job within a few days after I got it, but hung in there for over a year hoping things would improve.
But aside from the job itself, I was also no longer happy with the work. I had worked extremely hard to make a career change into the work I was doing. I had been doing the work for 8 years and had only been at this company for a little over a year. Getting the job indicated a measure of my success in this field. If I had worked so hard to get here, why was I unhappy?
Anyway, I had always wanted to hike the Pacific Crest Trail and I realized I had a lot of money saved up and could afford to go so I quit. It was magical to quit because I felt like I was following a calling and everything fell into place.
Now I am home after having hiked only 1500 miles of the trail. The trail is 2650 miles long. My feet couldn't go any further. So now I have to figure out what to do next. What else could I do that involves walking, nature, flowers, being active, being outdoors, putting my feet on the earth instead of on pavement and friendly, non-competitive people?
To try to answer that I signed up for a volunteer job working in a garden. It turned out to be a food garden so what a find because I get paid in fruit and vegetables! I sometimes think I might enjoy working in horticulture somehow, but fear that I would not be able to survive the low pay and that I am probably not strong enough to do it all day every day. My hope is the volunteer job will open myself up to things I hadn't thought of.
I also found out about an organization that hosts monthly networking events for people who work with the environment so I figured I would go and see if I could meet people. I don't work with the environment and definitely don't like the kinds of jobs I see advertised, but maybe my understanding of what is possible is too limited. I will go with an open mind and see if it leads me anywhere.
I kept a blog while I hiked the trail and several people said I should turn it into a book. So I'm working on combining my blog posts and the pen and paper journal I kept on the trail into a book. I don't know if my writing skills are good enough to call myself a writer, so I'm writing it as a self-published book.
Other than that, I'm not sure what to do. I had planned before I left the hike to maybe get a part-time job just to make a little money. Maybe make coffee or sweep up somewhere or something really low-key.
But I have a mental block about getting a part-time job. As much as I really would rather be doing something mindless, meaningless and physical, I can't seem to bring myself to take a job earning so little money. I hate to be a money snob, but I feel my time is worth more than $10 an hour or whatever they pay. But I just don't want to work full time for some company ever again. I think partially it's fear of being judged if I take a low-paying job.
So, I'm a little stuck right now but I have a little time before my money runs out (Where did I get it? I saved it for the last 10 years by living way below my income and never going into debt). I'm trying not to let fear take over. I'm trying not to let people who are jealous of my freedom get me down, but it is hard to defend not working, or not living up to my potential.
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