I was reading another post and it triggered a realization that I wanted to share.
Whenever people give me a compliment, I never trust its sincerity or authenticity.
I'm 27 years old. If someone tells me I did a good job on my last consulting project, or my hair looks nice, I flat-out don't believe them. I don't explicity tell these compliment-givers that I don't believe them, but I'm sure my body language gives them a clue. Instead of going into the "Thank you" routine I typically just shrug it off and down play it.
The interesting thing is that I know exactly what caused this behaviour. Ah, the good 'ol teenage years... I was 13 years old, my first year in middleschool. I was never part of the cool crowd but somehow I ended up making friends with someone who was pretty high on the popularity scale. Our friendship only lasted a few weeks. It ended when she and another popular girl complimented my clothes and then laughed at me, all part of some cruel joke. Typical teenage stuff but it had a huge impact on me. From that point on, I thought that whenever someone gave me a compliment, they were in some way picking on me or mocking me.
Unfortunately, knowing the cause of something doesn't necessarily change anything.
Anyway, my husband was keen enough to catch on to my behavior. (Yes, even if my husband, my bestest friend in the whole world, gave me a compliment, I would shrug it off and down-play it.) Now, every time he gives me a compliment, he makes me repeat the following phrase:
"Thank you honey, that means a lot to me."
It's amazing because I think that little exercise is really helping me!
