I would say thinking about "us", not "you and me".
People have things that unite them, and things that separates them.
People need personal growth, and people have emotional needs.
The problem seems a matter of fixing the "terms of (emotional) contract" to see if those issues can be solved.
In a relationship there is no one to blame.
What needs to be fixed is the interaction, not people.
Therefore Angela, I disagree with you.