Thank you for your advice. From what you've said, it would be better to re-evaluate my perspective, and look at it from the Path of the Warrior.
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Originally Posted by Mato Kinze  If your actions are saying that you are not being humble, then perhaps you need to examine your definition of "humility". |
This is a hard for me to explain. I think by actions you picture me going out of my way to make me look good, much like a stereotypical highschool jock (just for the sake of reference) would. But that isn't the case at all. I view it on a much more subtle level, and I don't necessarily (hardly ever) act to gain approval. In fact, other people (besides the ones who can read me) hardly notice what I'm doing. It could be that I'm still a bit self-conscious, but I have been working on projecting love outwards, towards everyone.
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Originally Posted by Mato Kinze I always thought it was a little silly and childish. Even as a child. |
Then what are the alternatives? There was a stage where I called almost everyone dude (if I wasn't using their first name), but for some reason I've sensed a negative connotation associated with it. Should I refer to everyone by their first names all the time? There's also 'buddy', 'pal', 'friend', etc, but it doesn't seem to flow as smoothly. Maybe I have to expand my vocabulary of adjectives regarding people and become more comfortable with those words. Yes, actions speak louder than words, and body language comprises more than 90% of communication, but word choice still has a huge impact.
I use the words 'man', 'ma'am', and 'sir' almost exclusively while I'm working as a sign of respect towards the customer, I don't do it for my own benefit. Or maybe I do, because when they're recognized as such they feel better, making the transaction go a little bit more smoothly.
Are you saying I should stop appealing to people's egos? What happens then when I am speaking truthfully and honestly, and refer to one person as 'dude', 'buddy', or 'pal', and another person as 'man', 'ma'am', or 'sir'? Doing so creates a rift in equality. And again, keep in mind that not all of this is reflected outside, people (who are unaware) hardly seem to notice (but their subconscious does). I do my best to refer to everyone with respectable titles, so that in my mind, everyone is equal.