Just to be clear, Jaamkie, I'm not in favor of glossing over, acting, or pretending. I am in favor of seeing how generously and lovingly I can communicate with my lover, while at the same time being true to myself.
About the turn-ons and turn-offs? It's not what you say but how you say it. I could say, "I HATE that! Stop it!" and be being really honest. OR.... I could choose to gently guide him to the right spot, and celebrate when he gets there. Throw a little party and let him know he's made ME the guest of honor.
Or I could write him an anonymous note pieced together from old newspapers and magazines, like a ransom demand: "Bite that spot once more and you'll never see your shih-tzu FiFi again!" But that would be immoral.
