in another thread
limiting beliefs arising from lack of romantic/sexual experience about my lack of success with women, driven1 suggested part of my problem might be my body language. I have no idea if he's right, but figure it can't hurt, and good body language is generally an asset in social situations anyway, so I've decided to spend some time working on it.
I've been doing alexander technique for several months, which improves posture. Lately, I've been trying to avoid fidgeting when talking or listening to people, as well as crossing my arms or legs, standing with my drink between me and the person I'm talking to, or having my hands in my pockets, as I understand that these constitute closed, defensive body language. Instead, I'm trying to keep my hands relaxed by my sides, or in my lap when sitting, or with just the thumbs hooked into my pockets when standing.
I'd looking for suggestions as to other changes I can make to improve my body language, as well as any ideas for how install these new habits, so eventually I do these things without thinking about them. If anyone can suggest any good books or websites dealing with this stuff, that would also be greatly appreciated.
thanks,
chica