Quote:
Originally Posted by Radical  All the falseness of socialising makes me feel really empty. |
then find a way to make it not false.
just because people are playful doesnt mean they are false. and just because someone is "flirting" with you (what do you mean by that? talking playfully? joking around?) doesnt mean that person wants to jump your bones -- not necessarily, and not necessarily right now.
people think that romantic relationships involve lots of "game-playing" and i guess you can choose to look at it that way if you want to. the way it looks to me is that certain things in the universe work in certain ways. as mr. big put it, a bunch of garlic and onions and tomatoes and salt and oregano does not spaghetti sauce make. you have to chop the veggies and brown the garlic, etc. certain steps come at certain times.
for me, there's a lot of steps of getting to know someone that have to come before sex even matters. the trick is to derive enjoyment from every step, and not rush through just to get to the next -- this is something i'm really trying to work on too.
to answer the original question, can males and females ever interact in a non-sexual way? i would say yes, of course. there certainly are not sexual undertones when i talk to my grandpa, for instance. nor are they there with most of my male colleagues. but there is playfulness in all of those interactions.
i guess i'm just trying to get you to see that playfulness <> always about sex. if you can decouple them in your mind, then you will be able to be more playful yourself. and once you start being playful with girls, ironically, it will be a lot easier for you to connect with them, whether it's on a friendly or an overtly sexual level.