Again I would like to respond as if it were only for myself. Also I like to show you were my thoughts are at concerning these issues. Actually, i just overthought all this again as I was confusing myself. I now only go with three things:
-"If I were feeling really good and connected with these people, how would that feel?"
-"Speak before you think. Next time you have something to say that's deviant, say it anyway"
-Watching/being aware of negative thoughts. Just observing them and not attaching emotions to them. I think that is the essence of watching.
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