Hey Madhatter
In my opinion this guy isn't going to learn. He has no motivation to learn, you're still with him after all he's done. If I were in your position I'd leave immediately, not that it would be easy, but look at what you're doing. You're choosing him over your self respect.
What is a relationship when you boil it down? A huge component of a relationship is integrity and mutual trust. He does not have integrity and he is not about to learn it.
You need to have the sense of self worth to see that you dont need this guy. You really dont, you can get another guy who wont treat you like this. The world is full of guys, he's not the most attractive he's not the only one for you! You have to see that you have options here.
I feel btw that you will learn this lesson regardless. Either you'll leave, he'll dump you or (most likely) he'll cheat on you and devastate you.
It's your life, it's up to you to get a guy you want to be with. It's like the old saying "you can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink". You've told your bf that you want integrity, you've showed him you're very unhappy with how he is treating you. There's nothing else you can do, either he see's his lack of integrity as a problem or he doesn't. You can't change him.
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