Quote:
Originally Posted by August  ''I love my parents and siblings unconditionally (I have two younger sisters and one younger brother). However, I haven’t had a particularly close-knit relationship with any of them for many years. There was no major falling out or anything like that — it’s just that my personal values and lifestyle have moved so far from theirs that there isn’t enough basic compatibility to form a strong common bond anymore. '' Understanding Family Relationship Problems
I relate strongly to this.
I come from a family of very religious dedicated Muslims that have ALL gone to university and completed ''respected'' degrees such as medicine. This is also expected of me.
I myself do not believe/resonate with Islam, (I would never dare tell them this)
..and I do not want to go university (if I do, there is only a select few degrees that are acceptable to them lol). I would like to follow my own path but I feel that I can't.
I am of adult age but I don't have the courage to stand up to my parents and go against tradition. They are loving people but I couldn't imagine what my family would do if I did go against them and followed my dreams... even gently suggesting other opinions/things that I would like to do with my life, they get extremly angry and animated
(btw I have read Steve's articles on courage)
I feel depressed and trapped
Any advice? Steve/ anyone?
Thank you. |
There is no advice that can help you when you are unwilling to face a fear (telling family what you want). People can tell you a story or give you advice to do this and it might make you feel good for a little while but the problem still isn't solved because you still don't have the courage to do what you want.
Your situation is no different than other people's situation's that feel like they have no choice in the matter. The circumstances might be different but they all involve a choice that you are either making or not making. Saying that you have no choice is just a victim rationalization of YOU CHOOSING to let your fears get the best of you. Yes you do have a choice, there is no gun involved. Even if there was a gun there is a choice-die for freedom or live as a slave?
The ramification's of your actions will be difficult but that's the only way you will be able to find happiness and be able to respect yourself. If you don't do it YOUR FAMILY is the one who is living your life and making you their little puppet.