If your relationship with yourself is unhealthy (e.g., you are deeply depressed, or still in the midst of processing the lesson from a previous relationship), you bring that to your current dating life. Who you'll attract is a person who resonates with your ill health or lack of availability. So it depends on what you are willing to create for yourself -- do you want a healthy loving, long-term, mutually beneficial relationship or period of dating for fun, or are you willing to jump right into a relationship in which you'll be struggling and suffering?
Everybody's got old pain that they carry into relationships. The question is: how much of that old pain are you going to take responsibility for, and how much are you going to consider can be "cured" by another person? The ratio is what will determine how successful you'll be in creating the kind of relationship you really want.
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