Well, I'm not great at this so take it w/ a grain of salt
but I've learned to be more selfish in these situations. Meaning that I need to pay more attention to what interests me and to be less afraid to bring it up. I tend to be very attentive even when I don't really care and then I zone out. I dunno if your experiences are similar but hopefully it helps.
Just relax and talk about what you want to talk about but don't forget to include the other person... and by selfishness I mean pay attention to your interests, not to totally discount the other person entirely. Good luck and remember you're not the only person that struggles w/ this.