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Originally Posted by SonoranBob 
I strongly suspect that you are talking about what in my experience is the most common female fantasy: The Diamond in the Rough (tm). This plays out in many ways, including:
1) I'm not worthy of a diamond, so I will find one that needs a little work and polish it up myself (diamonds are the hardest substance known to man. They aren't easy to polish). |
It isnt that i'm not worthy of a diamond,it's that diamonds are everywhere,falling from the sky,landing in your lap,practically begging you to have them. It isnt that i dont think i deserve someone who is so willing to love me,its that i cant make myself want someone who ALREADY wants me. Most things in life are like this,you dont appreciate things that are forced on you. You appreciate the things you have to work for. The things that you WANT to have before you have them. What fun is it to get everything you want before you even know you want it?
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2) He will be eternally grateful to me for saving him (good luck with that!)
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Why is this such a bad thing? lol I mean,i want to be saved,so naturally it would be a good thing if this happened,and if i could save someone else too. I dont see how this is bad at all.
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3) He will always need me (maybe so, but he will hate himself for
needing you and hate you for making him dependent on you).
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I dont want him to NEED me as in he doesnt have a life without me or doesnt feel happy without me. I want a man who doesnt need to be in a relationship. I dont want to be his lifeline. Maybe when i talk about saving someone it means different than what you think. Maybe its just the wrong word (i am bad at wording things,if you cant tell already LOL) I just want to HELP him.
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4) I will feel great about myself because I have swooped in and Made A Difference (for who? Not for him -- he didn't think enough of himself to be a self-made man. It's for you -- he owes you godess-worship).
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LOL That makes it sound so bad though! I dont want someone to be a spineless follower who worships me. I want an equal. And by swooping in and making a difference,he would also be doing that to me. Equality!
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What is wrong with good boys, anyway? Saves you a lot of trouble and alot of responsibility that isn't really yours anyway. What is it about good boys that puts you off?
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I didnt say i didnt want a good boy. It just so happens that every good boy i've ever met is clingy and desperate. Theyre too busy trying to prove to everyone how good they are. I would like a good guy who is shy,down to earth,has a life of his own,can be friends first,and doesnt need a relationship,isnt looking for one,in fact. Good guys are always out there practically begging girls to date them because they're "so dateable". Like i said in my opening paragraph,its hard to want something that you don't get a chance to want,its practically thrown at you.
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PS: There is a REASON no one else was willing to save that flower. Hint: it isn't because they fail to see the value in the flower, or because they lack your huge capacity for compassion.
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Enlighten me! lol Is it because they dont have the patience that i do? Because he didnt have enough money to buy them designer clothes and jewelry? Because most women get turned off by shy,insecure guys?