Sometimes we like to suffer, its weird, but that the way our minds works, so we keep doing or not doing the things that hurt us, the drunk, the person who cuts his wirst, the teenager who dont do their homework, the person who eats a lot, the person who doesnt work at all, the person who keeps getting into relationships that hurt him/her, they all suffer from that, but they cant change by just using their will, because their desire is not actually to change but to keep getting pleasure by hurting themselves and suffering, conciously they know that its no good, subcounciously they want to keep suffering.
I strongly recommend you to use EFT to work on the inner problems you may have about suffering. EFT its a strange technique but works really good for resolving psycological problems like traumas, bad feelings, bad thoughts, etc, try it, i used it and can say it does what it promises, Tapping.com - Free EFT Videos - Emotional Freedom Technique
there are other videos on youtube you should look for too.
Jesus bless you.